Monday, June 20, 2011

Gamalost, Not Even Norwegians Eat This Stuff

Here we are at last at the end of our extended weekend of Norwegian noms, but now I must bring you something that belongs in a horror story, a tale from the crypt, a fearsome fromage that even I would hesitate to try again, much less recommend. If you are so fortunate as to find it somewhere in your travels do by all means purchase some, but don't break the bank: this stuff is just not pleasant and is one of the only cheeses that, I admit it, I threw out after tasting.
That's the warning, and the name is Gamalost, directly translated as Old Cheese. This description is half right, as it's certainly not young. It is a skim milk cheese, containing only some 1% fat per solid content, and while it's supposedly a sort of blue cheese it really is, well, I'll tell you what I think of it.
Origin: Norway
Milk: Cow, pasteurized
Rennet: Animal
Affinage: 4-5 weeks
Notes: Gross
Thoughts: This cheese is an assault on the senses in pretty much every way. In appearance it looks like someone took brown sugar and pressed it into a mold, it is devoid of any identifiable paste and, upon peeling back the plastic wrap, step two of the assault begins. It smells like cheese that’s gone bad, that Camembert you tossed out last week or the Roquefort that is warm and liquidic enough to make into a smoothie. Step three is eating it. It is granular and chewy, lingering in your mouth and asking the question “why?”. The flavor is pretty much like the smell, only lacking that life-saving distance from your tastebuds. It is sharp, very sour, devoid of any creaminess or sweetness, or any of the charm of the more potent blue cheeses. The flavor lingers making the very air in your mouth sickly warm and sour, probably as a reminder to safeguard against a second bite. Chase it with something strong, maybe a single malt.  Caution I do not condone underage drinking. If you're underage or just don't particularly care for the taste of whiskey then... really spicy Mexican food? Shot of Tabasco? Tongue transplant surgery?   

16 comments:

  1. Not that I would EVER come close to buying this...but I like your description of it. I'm sorry you had to go through so much pain.

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  2. Oh, but we do! I am having an evening snack this very moment, consisting of nothing but Gamalost. Sissies ruin it with sour cream or soft butter; I prefer it au naturel, in thin slices. I admit it takes some getting used to, but when you learn to really appreciate its extremely complex and layered flavour and aroma, most modern-day cheeses pale in comparison.

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    1. I'm a pungent cheese freak living in Utah. I can only dream about tasting this cheese. Who knows what could happen in the future?

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    2. I've sent it in the mail to the US once and I'm willing to do it again.

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    5. I would like that. Can we please trade information.

      I really want to experience that cheese!!

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    6. I'm norweigen and I get the cheesevthrough ebay. Come directly from Norway.

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  3. Sindre, I admire your passion for Norwegian cheese and I am glad that there are those who truly love it. Perhaps I had a bad piece, perhaps it didn't fare well on the trip from Norway, perhaps I had eaten some bad eggs that morning which made the cheese taste like a long since spoiled omelet. On the odd occasion that I encounter some again I will give it a second chance. I also long to try the Sardinian maggot cheese Casu marzu, but as this blog is meant to be informative (partially) I must advise my readers with a clear conscience and a cleansed palate.

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    1. Were you able to find it in the US?

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    2. You can buy it on eBay and they ship it to the US! Delicious!

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  4. Actually, this cheese is quite tasty when eaten right. On a visit to Lofthus, Norway to revisit the church and hotel where my wife and I were married in 2002 a Norwegian couple at the next table introduced me to it. They explained that you put a slice on a cracker and smear it with a dob of butter---then eat it. The butter adds taste, and most importantly, moisture to the cheese. Eaten this way it was very good. They did admit it was not that popular even in Norway and that I was the first foreigner they had met who liked it. I continued eating some after dinner for the rest of our stay and loved it! Trying to find it here in the USA!

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  5. I just have to say that I absolutely love all of this discussion. Personally, I've never had Gamalost and frankly have little to no desire to even try (or smell) it but all my life, my family has long held onto a hilarious story about Gamalost and if you'll indulge me, I'll attempt to tell it here...

    It was a hot weekday in Pasadena and my parents and I had moved back to southern California to live briefly with my dad's parents, who were both Norwegian, grandpa having come over from a region north of the arctic circle when he was 14. On this day, Grandpa and my dad went to their respective jobs in the cool of the California summer morning while my mom and I (only one year old at the time) stayed home. The day began to warm up considerably and nearing the hottest part of the day, the mailman arrived. My mom describes the mailman as walking up to the front door carrying a package but not just carrying it normally. He had that package extended away from his face as far as his arms could possibly reach. My mom greeted him at the door and he, discarding any pleasantries, simply said, "Here you go ma'am...whatever is in there is dead." And turned to leave as fast as he could. My mother assumed basically the same position as the mailman had after catching a whiff of the contents eliminating from beneath the brown paper wrapped package. As she glanced at the package, she noted that the return address was from Norway. She knew of my grandfather's love of exotic foods from his childhood home there, and she suspected that my grandmother, who wasn't home at the time, would greatly appreciate NOT having this package in her nice smelling fridge in the house. So she quickly marched the exotic package out to the garage and left it on grandpa's work bench.

    Well grandpa arrived later that day and when informed that an extremely smelly package had arrived from Norway and was in the garage aging accordingly, his face lit up with a huge smile, he crossed the kitchen, grabbed a knife and hurriedly made his way to the garage for a snack.

    Over the course of weeks, he would come home from work and head right out to the garage where grandma made him keep the cheese, and would take in the aromas and flavors in peace...and all alone :)

    Many have laughed at this story over and over (as have I) and I (and my family) thank you all for all of your comments and the initial review. God bless!

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  7. I like it on brown bread, but I have to get it from my relatives in Oslo. Wish I could get it here

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